Tuesday, May 12, 2015

Letter to Ishaan

Appale Rayya, (Dad's Prince)

At this wee hour of the night, as I write this letter, you have turned  9 months and 17 days old. You have completed more number of days outside, than in your mom’s womb.

I wanted to spill my thoughts and emotions to you. Unfortunately, you are too young to even read these complicated emotions.


                    I woke up frantic this morning as I heard you pull in that naughty, unique noise through your tiny nostril as you stood by the bedside, all solo.

I was concerned with the thought of you hitting down. For, you have still not begun to stand and balance all by yourself.

As I spread out my eyes, I caught you standing by the bedside and deliberately making that (cute) noise to wake me up from my deep slumber. Though you haven’t started to talk,  your methods of communication are par excellence compared to any and that amazes me.

The toothless smile of yours, this morning reminded me of Lord Shri Krishna and his playful acts as a toddler, which made him the favorite of all.  

You must know, You are my Kaanha – The Lil Krishna.

(Later on a stressful day, your smile rejuvenates me.)

I was on cloud nine when I was informed by my Ma, that,  you pointed my jeans, hung in the cupboard and exclaimed "Pa".

You gave me such an adorable title "Pa". Each time you stutter and call out “PA”, my heart pounds.

(Pa - means Father. Father the giver of life.  Ishaan, my son, in our case, you are the life giver to me. You have added meaning to my otherwise hollow Life. )

Oh Ishaan, How do I let you experience my emotions for you?

 I am so absorbed in the tide of those emotions, as I compose this letter to you.

I was ecstatic when you enveloped me and clung around me as I was about to leave.

Oh, apple of my eye, first time ever after my negligible existence in this universe, I felt that I am wanted.  You are the only cause for such an amazing feeling.

I realized the  Purpose of my life.

Ishaan, my infant son, I have left a kiss along your brow.

You are a blessing to an otherwise deserted life of mine.

Someday, you must read this letter and know that your Pa loves(d ) you than himself.

Pa - Only Yours.

Date - 12th May 2015.

Copyright @ Ajay Pai 2015
Image Courtesy: AJ's personal archive